The feeling of getting rejected can be hurtful. After feeling up, it can easily take you down a few notches. Rejection will make an appearance many times throughout your life. You won’t understand it at first but, once you start to read into the situation, you will.
Want the truth? Nobody likes being rejected (because why would they). The good thing about rejection is it makes the best better. You may not believe me right now but it is true. You will rise from this negative place and become stronger, bolder, and more confident.
Here’s what you need to do when rejection decides to come around:
- Allow the natural negative feelings to happen
- Weigh the pros and cons of the situation
- Ask for clarification on what you could have done better
- Turn the negativity into positivity and push harder towards your goals
Never, I repeat, never allow yourself to wallow in the negativity for long periods of time. Overstressing about something out of your control is unnecessary. Always remember that what is meant to be will be! By taking this proverbial weight off your shoulders, you are doing yourself a huge favor. If you don’t, you will lose confidence and hold yourself back from moving on.
Rejection. May we all face it, embrace it, and overcome it.
Mentally strong people deal with rejection in their own ways. According to this article from Inc., they refuse to let rejection define them. And guess what? Neither should you! Refusing to let rejection define you means you have the control. You are behind the wheel on this ride and nobody can stop you from making it to your destination… even if it feels like it now.
The most common places rejection appears are relationships, friendships, education, and job searching (my favorite). Each of these is in a very different territory. Regardless of the situation, you can make light of rejection by following my 4 steps above. Making light of a rather unpleasant circumstance gives you the chance to just breathe. In fact, let’s add breathe to our list of things to always do when you feel stressed!
It’s about making the most of the worst.
College applications were my first taste at ‘not feeling worthy’ rejection. Receiving that thin letter in the mail (especially the first one) is a very deflating moment. You fold the pages open in anticipation of the no you are about to read. When you challenge yourself, you make yourself more susceptible to being rejected. That being said, you also make yourself more likely to achieve those high-reach goals. Worth it? I say absolutely.
Your first experience job hunting will likely be the worst. I had never faced so much rejection in my life! Why? Because I applied to positions that had a lot of competition. There are way more factors that go into hiring than just your experience and that is something I learned from being rejected.
I take rejection as someone blowing a bugle in my ear to wake me up and get going, rather than retreat.
~ Sylvester Stalone
I like to ask why I was not the right fit and then decide for myself what the next steps are to embodying more of what they looked for in a candidate. It is awkward at first but it will help you to learn and grow. Once you understand what you did or did not have you can start making light of the rejection. Now, not only is this experience in your toolkit, you know you are capable of getting where you need to be and have an idea of how.
My honest advice on rejection
If you’ve been rejected then you know it sucks. I won’t try to sugar coat it because I have I’ve felt that kick to my ego many times! In both the blogging and corporate world you are going to hear lots and lots of no at first. That’s because you are putting yourself out there for something you want and believe you deserve.
At some point you will start to shake it off and perfect your next pitch… the one that might be your first yes. All that hard work is going to pay off for you! Take it from me, pitching your first handful (okay, maybe more) of brand deals and job applications will be difficult but you will realize quickly what works and what doesn’t.
The yes you get will result in a major confidence boost. It will lift you up and make you feel alive! You can finally make light of all that rejection because you are in a good place. All of these experiences are pushing you up, up, up until you reach the top. Pretty soon we are going to get there together.